Radscorpion Queen: Ascent to Power
by Kitkatinahat
Summary: Ever wonder how that giant radscorpion made it into that firehouse? FEAR NOT! For I have the answer! However you have to do this horrid thing called reading to find out how, sorry. :U  Side note: R AND R PL0X
1. DOORS! My only Weakness!

Radscorpion Queen; Doors! My only weakness!

Ever wonder how that giant radscorpion made it into that firehouse? FEAR NOT! For I have the answer! However you have to do this horrid thing called reading to find out how, sorry :U

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><p>Swinging her giant pincer forward, the Queen struck her opponent. Clicking her mandibles together, in triumph, she turned towards the others of the small group that entered her prison. Oh how she would make all of them rue the day that they decided to trap her, the great Queen of this land, inside a room by using her only weakness, <em>doors. <em>As the great Queen turned, marking her new targets for death…and possible food for later, she did not notice her first victim stand back up. As the Queen lunged, making sure to sound as menacing as possible, clicking her legs together to get that nice _bone crunching_ sound out of them, she was struck. As she fell the great Queen could only muster one final send off, a curse to her only weakness, "FUCKING DOORS!"

This was how the great Radscorpion Queen fell, at the hands of Courier 6. Her tail was not just her trapped inside a dilapidated building, no her story is far more grand than this-though she did end up trapped inside a dilapidated building. She would not want to be remembered this way. No, her story is one of companionship and of triumph! Such a glorious tale, one that must be told…

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><p>The real story will unfold next time! SO STAY TUNED! Otherwise the great Radscorpion Queen will surely haunt your dreams!<p> 


	2. STEVEN!

Hello again readers! This is your second installment of _Radscorpion Queen: Ascent to Power! _If I could add more exclamations I would, but that would be entirely too juvenile, the great Radscorpion Queen would have my entrails ripped from my living flesh if I did so. AND SO, ONTO THE STORY!

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><p>Before that horrid day, our great Queen was but a babe; a small Radscorpion just like all others. However, unlike the others, she was meant for greater things! And so, the story begins (for real this time)…<p>

The sun beating down on her pale white skin was the first thing to great her in this life. Clicking her approval for such a harsh land, she looked about…only to see that she was not alone. She had others that were on top of this blackened mount. This was highly unacceptable; whatever they were riding needed to be only for her. Sharing is always out of the question when you are meant for greatness, which she already knew. Knowing how utterly awesome she was meant to be, she made haste off of this dark colored mount, clicking her mandibles in anger as she made contact with the sand below. Her shell was not meant for this yet, she needed to stay on the mount-NO, WHERE DID IT GO? She clicked fervently trying to gain the attention of the mount, where ever it may have gone. However it was already too late, she was now alone in a harsh environment (which was totally okay with her, she was meant for great things so this is nothing she couldn't handle).

This was a mere stepping stone to greatness, at least that's what she told herself as she scurried for cover as if her life depended on it. As she ran something had noticed her. This was once again, only a mere stepping stone to her greatness. This something would be no match for her! She could easily outrun it, though she could easily kill the creature with a mere glance if she so wished, however she was willing to be generous this day. As she scurried away, the damn thing had the gall to make chase after her, and to think she was going to let this thing live.

This thing however was a worthy advisory; it actually caught up to her. Of course it would have never caught up to her if she wasn't already being so kind, giving it a sense of worth was what a good conqueror of the land was supposed to do after all. She turned to face off with her aforementioned—HOLY DICKS THAT THING IS HUGE.

She stood her ground, much like David and Goliath; she shall not fear this giant thing. She would smite this thing much like how the Moses defeated Jesus at the battle of Babylon! She was reading like frantic, this book that she was using as a rudimentary shield was flipping through pages like crazy (And yes all Radscorpion's know how to read naturally, it's that rad that makes it possible). She was now shaking in fea—in horror of what she was going to do to this giant creature. Oh the things that she would do once it got close enough! All would bow down before her as a killer of that giant creature that dared to chase her. All would hear the tale how she took down such a giant of a thing. Stories would be told for generations!

However the giant creature had other ideas, it picked her up. Yes the giant creature picked her up, her this utterly defenseless adorable FEARSOME soon to be ruler of all that can be seen by all, UP! How dare it! The thing looked her over a bit. Probably trying to discern how something so tiny could be so awesome…yes! That it exactly what it was doing; nothing about eating her or crushing her underneath one of its two feet. That would be out of the question for her, she after all was destined for greater things than to be eaten up so early in her great life. This giant thing then did something unexpected, it became her mount. Oh how she was wrong in almost killing it, she should have known this was one of her followers. Why else would this thing be so big? Only one of her devoted lackeys would work so hard to look so fearsome that it made even her, with her fearless gaze question her fearlessness!

This was the beginning of a wonderful partnership. The giant, she named it Steven. Steven is an excellent lackey name; all lackeys should be named Steven. Steven began to walk, such an excellent mount really. Steven fed her like a good lackey would, and even made a bed for her at night. She was sure to make Steven her number one...thing. He was surely the most fearsome of her followers. Most indefinitely.

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><p>STAY TUNED FOR MORE!<p> 


	3. Rather fancy cave ya got there

Hello once again readers, here is another grand installment of Radscorpion Queen: Ascent to Power. Now please take note that these chapters are of varying size, as I tend to not give a damn about it. JUST A HEADS UP, AREN'T I NICE? I know I am C:

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><p>Steven, now Knight Steven (the knighting ceremony consisted of her dancing on the man's head, it was a rather moving little number) took her far from where they first met. He would often stop for resupply; she of course would let him. As Queen of this land she had to make sure her subjects were fed, poor man would not be able to do anything without her. Clicking her approval for the provisions attained by Knight Steven they headed off! Lands unknown will know the glory of her massive claws, which have now become that of a darker color, instead of that horrid white. All will fear her and Knight Steven! However the fear felt from Knight Steven will only be a small percentile of the fear that they feel towards her! The mighty Queen, conqueror of the world will be known as… Queen! Clicking her approval of such a wondrous inner monolog had distracted her from where Knight Steven was actually taking her.<p>

Knight Steven had taken her inside of some constructed cave. Maybe they were there to kill the giant evil thing that must live in here. Of course, one meant for great things must destroy things, so much sense it hurts. Gathering up her courage for a brutal battle for the centuries, she wiggled a bit on top of her Knight Steven. However Knight Steven put her down on the ground, she began to worry for her faithful Knight. He surely could not take on a foe that lives in such a neatly constructed cave! No Knight Steven! Don't go without your mighty Queen to aid you!

However that was not what he was doing, he called out. Knight Steven was not leaving her to fight the giant space monster from Neptune alone! Surely nothing else would live in a cave such as this, only a giant space monster could live in such a strange cave, with its flat walls and strange clutter on the ground. However the giant space monster did not come, more Stevens came! Oh good, her glorious kingdom was growing-OH GOD DON'T SQUISH YOUR OVERLORD!

The Queen had to duck for cover more than once as Steven 2 and Steven 3 tried to stomp her existence out. These Stevens will have to die, but that will have to come after Knight Steven does his job and PROTECTS HIS QUEEN. That moron will surely be demoted…to stable boy. Quickly moving back to now, STABLE BOY Steven for safety the great Queen made her demands; open the cave and Stable Boy Steven won't feel the mighty sting of me! However Stable Boy Steven had another plan, he pushed Steven 1 and 2! Oh Steven, you have secured your Knight Hood. Good boy.

Knight Steven told the others Stevens what for, she clicked in approval. How dare they try anything with her! Knight Steven would tell them off; obviously he was being generous not killing them and all. Dealing with the other Stevens, Knight Steven took it upon himself to make a place for her; such a good Knight. Yes making this the official center of the Kingdom is a good idea, such a good looking cave; with plenty of Stevens.

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><p>How does this bode for our great Queen to be? I HAVE NO IDEA BRO. LET'S FIND OUT LATER.<p> 


	4. Evil Stairs!

Hello once again readers! It's so nice to see that all of you are still reading this wondrous tale! It's so full of awesome I am sure none of you can actually handle it. How any of you are still here is beyond my own comprehension, though I am sure you are here for one thing and one thing only! THE MIGHTY QUEEN! Well then let's have a look see at how she is adjusting to life.

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><p>The almighty ruler of the world has met her first true enemy. <em>Stairs. <em>These horrid things are impossible to conquer. They mock her with every living...creak! These stairs will be the death of someone, she just knows it. She, being the almighty Queen that she is, is trying to diligently look after her most loyal of subjects, Knight Steven! Having accepted the humblest of apologies from Stevens 1 through 10 via snack cakes, _delicious delicious snack cakes; _she has attempted to make peace with them. Though why she has to try is beyond her, as she is the great and most powerful Queen of all! How dare they—ooo a snack cake!

One of the Stevens has taking a liking to giving her daily snack cakes. This is of course easily accepted, this Steven is only trying to make up for past mistakes. Poor fool has no idea that she has already forgiven him. Oh well, more snack cakes then. Chirping her approval for this gift, the Steven left her at the bottom of the stairs. If only she had told him to be her mount. After devouring the delicacy of her kingdom, she makes haste to the stairs once again. Staring daggers into them, trying to urge them to break with only a thought! She raises her mighty pincer, and BAM! She strikes the hideous stair square in the…er, STAIR! Take that you villain, how dare you try to conquer this mighty Queens territory by only standing there.

The all-powerful Queen then attempts to make it up the stairs, this was going to take some time. However this was nothing to her, soon she will be able to run up and down these stairs like all those Stevens, and maybe even faster than Knight Steven himself! Such a wonderful Knight really, so fast and agile. She must remember to tell him that once she finds where he is up there.

Gathering up all her power, the mighty Queen makes a jump! She only manages to get a pincer up onto the second stair, but not one to be put off so easily she places her other mighty pincer onto the step. This was going to be the most glorious day in her kingdom, the day SHE their Queen conquered _stairs. _Using her all mighty stinger, she pushed herself up and—MADE IT UP ONE STAIR! Oh, if only Knight Steven could see her, he would be so proud he would give her another one of those snack cakes-wait a minute. Knight Steven only ever gives her one of those cakes after he goes up these evil stairs. Surely there must be a cache of them up there. Yes, it's the perfect plan. Go up the stairs, and devour all the snack cakes in the land. No one will ever lord over her with the mighty taunt of a snack cake out of her mighty reach! Clicking a very ominous laugh, and snapping her pincers together she made a show for all to see how ingenious she truly is!

The mighty climb and defeat of the stairs was a wondrous tale, one filled with hardship and many mid-day naps. The Queen after all had only just gotten her dark shell after all; she was still but a babe in the eyes of her subjects. The final stair was the hardest, it had to be a centimeter higher than all the rest! At least that's what the ruler said, at least that's what she thought it said, she saw one on a step further down…that one may have been upside down though. BUT THAT IS IN THE PAST! Now, defeating these stairs! With one mighty leap she defeated the final stair. Clicking in utter triumph and pinching her pincers above her head in the most awesome of manner was the only way to possibly celebrate such a huge success!

Quickly celebrating her defeat of the stairs; this is now available on holotape at a holotape dispenser near you! She made haste to the closest open room. Scurrying past Steven 15, and 26 she dived behind the large grey object. She saw some strange strings! Surely these must be pests to take care of! Knight Steven was losing his edge in his old age! The Queen dove for the strings! Biting with her mighty mandibles and pinching the ever loving dickens out of these strings! Have at the evil strings of unknown origin! Surely they were sent here by the stairs to plot an assassination attempt on her! However the almighty Queen is far too fast and-OH GOD IT STINGS! The strings have made a counter attack, of emitting such a strange energy! It hurts-AH! The almighty Queen was being plucked from behind the grey object by, oh good Knight Steven.

The mighty Queen went about telling Knight Steven the tale of defeating the evil Stair King. Surely this should be written down later by him, he is a great writer after all. He takes all the official notes for the kingdom, such a good Knight. Clicking her tale by pinching her pincers in the air at certain times, she made sure that Knight Steven got it all. That dreadful dust bunny she had to overtake on the fourth step, and that time that Steven 2 almost tripped down the stairs! Such horrid things stairs are.

Knight Steven took her back downstairs, and put her down onto her royal bedding of old snack cake wrappers. Knight Steven shook his finger at her in obvious approval of her actions; he then took it upon himself to secure the stairs with a gate. Now those stairs will never bother anyone again-OH WAIT THE SNACK CAKES! They will forever be trapped upstairs, far from reach. The mighty Queen lost that day…to those evil stairs.

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><p>OH NO! D8 Readers, will the Queen ever get more snack cakes again? I HAVE NO IDEA! D8 Until next time!<p> 


	5. Fuzzy Creature, Oh How I hate The

Hello once again readers! I had family over, so the updates had to take a back seat! But don't worry readers; I am back to my schedule once again. Now let's see how things are going with Queen. :D

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><p>The Queens hard shell was starting to look a nice dark color. Such a nice carapace she was getting, all thanks to Knight Steven and the wondrous snack cakes he had been giving her each and every day as a thank you for her wonderful leadership skills. Knight Steven had even made her a bed, by the rusty old axes and giant doors. <em>Doors. Evil foul doors. All doors must be destroyed. Along with Stairs. <em>Doors were next on her hit list, they were evil and foul and required appendages to work them so that they could open that she did not have! Evil things.

However that was the least of her worries today, for little did she know that Knight Steven had brought home something far more evil than another door; but a large four legged creature! Yes, it was true. Knight Steven brought home a creature that barked, licked and sometimes _growled. _The almighty Queen was perplexed about the creature when it entered their wondrous _firehouse. _Yes, the almighty Queen had determined what in the hell the name of the awesome cave is, since last chapter.

When the foul creature was brought in by Knight Steven it had the audacity to bark at her! How dare it! She of course took on a most fearsome pose; her all-powerful stinger raise on high along with her pincers snipping in a most fearsome way. The creature lunged at her, she was prepared for an epic battle; one where only she, the Queen of all Stevens and land that could be seen could only undertake. However Knight Steven leapt into action and stopped the creature before it could even lunge at her. Such a good Knight, always protecting his Queen—WAIT WHAT? WHY ARE YOU PETTING THAT THING?

Knight Steven has found a new leader! How _dare_ he! She has done so much for him! She even knighted him! Now he is giving affections to—Oh sweet another snack cake. As the Queen happily snacked upon the most delectable cuisine in her kingdom, Knight Steven took the _evil foul four legged beast _upstairs. That damn thing could even take out stairs. _It must be in league with them. _Knight Steven must not know about this! The Queen, in a hurried frenzy, ate her snack cake then lunged for the gate! However the gate was already closed. Knight Steven looked back to appraise his Queen. He bent down and patted her atop her royal head. Knight Steven must know about that creature's allegiance with the foul _Stair alliance of evil and corrupt…CORRUPTNESS! _Knight Steven would never leave her side, ever. Perish the thought.

When the next day came, Knight Steven came down with _that creature. _He also had another Steven with him, the Queen happily greeted them both. Clacking her mandibles together as she always does, however Knight Steven took out a rope! The rope was the attached to her royal tail! KNIGHT STEVEN! HOW DARE-STOP PULLING! Knight Steven, he had gotten in allegiance with that creature and the stairs! As the all-powerful Queen was being pulled, the other Steven (Steven 15) went to open the door. The Queen was then dragged out-Oh, we are going outside? Why must the great Queen have a rope upon her mighty stinger? OH ANOTHER SNACK CAKE! Knight Steven sure does know how to butter the Queen up. Such a nice Knight, surely the rope is a new fashion statement. It must be, Knight Steven knows best. As the mighty promenade went on, Knight Steven would stop and give his Queen a pat on the head. _Whereas the creature was getting no pats. HAH! Take that you foul creature. No pats for your icky fuzzy head. _Knight Steven led them on a mighty walk around the Queens Kingdom. It was such a wondrous walk, smaller Stevens came by to come see her. They shrieked with glee at her royal appearance. Knight Steven had to calm them, as they were just that excited. However they gave more pats to that fuzzy monstrosity than her. In fact, she only got one pat from a small Steven. Even then, the Queen was sure this small Steven was mentally disturbed in some way. She glared daggers into the fuzzy creature's skull. On the walk back to her wondrous kingdoms capitol, the creature ran off. Steven 15 ran after it, and Knight Steven went to chase it as well. However with Knight Steven was still attached to the mighty Queen. The mighty Queen was indeed curious as to what the evil creature ran to, so she started on a mighty jog after the creature, followed by her faithful Knight! Truly this was where Knight Steven would reveal to her his master plan of killing off the evil fuzzy crea-OH DEAR GOD WHAT IS THAT THING?

A giant creature, truly GIANT creature came to attack her kingdom! It had giant claws, and horns and made such a shriek! The evil fuzzy creature ran to attack it, Steven 15 took out his noise stick, and was firing at the thing. Knight Steven took out his own noise stick, and fired upon it as well. The Queen could only look in shock at what that thing was. It, it could not be real. A creature of that size could in no way be part of her kingdom! The fuzzy creature was attacking it, and was thrown back! Steven 15 was next on that things list! No! As Queen of this land she must protect her subjects! The Queen snipped the rope, and ran full speed at the thing! She quickly grabbed hold of its tail, and stung it with her mighty stinger repeatedly. Such an epic battle would ensue-OH GOD DON'T THROW ME.

The rest of the battle was a blur to the mighty Queen. She was thrown by the creature, and landed very far away from the battle. When she awoke, she was on her mighty thrown of snack cake wrappers by the rusted axes inside her kingdoms capitol. As her vision began to come back, she spotted Knight Steven with the fuzzy creature by his feet. He looked worse for wear, and Steven 15 was unaccounted for. The Queen then chirped out a greeting. The fuzzy created leapt up, and bounded to the Queen, it then proceeded to lick the ever loving day lights out of her. Knight Steven pushed the creature away, and gently pat his Queen on her head. Such a good Knight, the fuzzy creature seemed happy that she was alive too. Perhaps the creature was not so bad? Either way, the creature slept at her side that night, keeping the Queen nice and warm.

The fuzzy creature was named Pounce De Fuzzums by her majesty the next morning.

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><p>POUNCE DE FUZZUMS, the next in the Queens mighty court. What's next? Will Knight Steven ever get rid of that gate? Will the Queen ever get another snack cake? Will Pounce De Fuzzums battle another weird large creature? I HAVE NO IDEA. I HAVE YET TO WRITE THAT CHAPTER.<p> 


	6. Yet another Steven!

Hello once again readers! Are we all having fun? YES? Oh good, let's see what's happening with the Queen, Knight Steven and Pounce De Fuzzums.

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><p>Pounce De Fuzzums was yet another good choice in the Queen entourage. Really, the mighty Queen had an eye for these things. Knight Steven was enjoying the company; however it seemed that Pounce De Fuzzums was for one of the other Stevens. <em>That will just not do. <em>The mighty Queen had to keep her posy together. What in the hell type of posy only has two people in them? Really, just sad. The mighty Queen made an attempt to stop Pounce De Fuzzums from getting taken by Steven 9. Knight Steven came between the mighty Queen and Steven 9; nothing would stop the Queen from her task at hand. Not even the prospect from killing off the Stair Champion! That most foul of evil doer! The mighty Queen will one day face this foe, and beat him into the floor! Make him less vertical and what not! Then she will face the evil of evil doors. Those evil doors will know the wrath of the all-powerful Queen! They will shake in their door jams and fear the mere mention of-OOOO! IS THAT A SNACK CAKE? OH THANK YOU KNIGHT STEVEN!

Once again distracted by the kingdoms most favorite of treats, the mighty Queen clacks her goodbyes to Steven 9 and Pounce De Fuzzums. The mighty Queen added the wrapper to her royal bed of yummy reminders. As the Queen made her way to her most royal of furniture, Knight Steven took out her beautiful accessory. Ah yes, another walk into the wondrous kingdom. She really needs to figure out a name for this place. It just being a generic kingdom was getting lame.

On their mighty walk around the kingdom, the Queen read one of the old flyers that one of the Stevens had dropped. Such a silly flyer really, warning about something called a "Legate." What in the world is a "Legate?" It looked funny, and was very tiny. So tiny that she could hit this _Legate_ with her mighty pincer in one blow! The mighty Queen began to fight the Legate flyer, making quick swipes at the paper. The tiny Stevens took note of the mighty Queens task of improving morale, and added more paper to the epic mock battle; a truly awesome sight to see, the mighty Queen taking out one piece of paper after the other. Making note to swipe at the Legate paper more than the others. The tiny Stevens were starting to warm up to the mighty Queen. This pleased her so much that she clicked her mandibles in approval as one of the tiny Stevens took to patting her atop her mighty head.

Knight Steven took note of this, and bent down to encourage this interaction. Surely Knight Steven knew this was a very good public stunt, letting the little ones pet the mighty Queen. It would surely be in all the tabloids world round; "Mighty Queen of all that can be seen has a soft spot for tiny Stevens." Yes, the Queen would be the talk of the town. This made the Queen extremely happy. Once off again, the mighty Queen had a bit more pep in her mightiest of steps. Knight Steven came to a stop in front of another building, and tied the end of her wondrous accessory to a post and-LEFT THE QUEEN ALONE.

The mighty Queen was alone, outside with all the other Stevens just looking at her. They were silently judging her. Making judgments of her parliamentary decisions; surely they knew that it wasn't her idea to make the uniforms for the Stevens inside of the royal headquarters so bland! They were already like that! She swears! Oh no, one of them is approaching her. This Steven came with a stick, oh no, the lynching will surely start now. One thing will lead to another, Knight Steven and Pounce De Fuzzums will become lost without their Queen.

The mighty Queen, making one silent prayer was prepping for the worst. The Stevens out her outnumbered her, she would not make this out of here alive, and she just knew it. The Steven took its stick and—patted the Queen gently with it, in an almost loving manner. The Queen looked up at this Steven, with all of her eyes trying to judge what this Steven was going to do. After a bit with the stick, the Steven took its hand and patted her royal head. Knight Steven then came out, carrying a small package (hopefully it was more snack cakes). Knight Steven looked at the other Steven. This must be a form of territory battle for the species known as Steven. They were gazing at one another with an intensity that only the Queen could muster on the best of days. They must be communicating at such a deep level—oh hey look they are talking now. If only the Queen understood Steven. Though she could read English perfectly, she had no idea what language those two were talking in. Such a sad thing really, so much power but the basic grasp of language eluded her.

The new Steven accompanied Knight Steven and the mighty Queen back to the royal headquarters. They were going around it, they stopped around the back. The new Steven was pointing at the strange contraptions near the most evil of doors. _The ones without handles. _Curiosity over took the mighty Queen, she made a bold move and lunged for the objects. She felt a strange tingly feeling all throughout her being. It made her feel, STRONG. Oh so STRONG. Perhaps she should just stay here a bit-AH KNIGHT STEVEN, DON'T PULL THAT.

Knight Steven pulled back the mighty Queen; he appeared to be worried for her royal being. He was assessing her like she was damaged in some sort of way. The mighty Queen reassured her subject with a mighty pat to his head, which made Knight Steven giggle in some sort of way. The other Steven became curious as to why the mighty Queen was doing such a simple task. Did this Steven not understand how well she treated her subjects? This Steven became very interested in Knight Steven then, talking in excited tones. Knight Steven then invited the strange Steven inside the headquarters, and began to give the mighty Queen a look over as well. Hm, perhaps this Steven should be removed he seems to be very irksome-OH SWEET ANOTHER SNACK CAKE. THANK YOU NEW STEVEN, BEST FRIEND.

The new Steven had found his way into the mighty Queens heart, via snack cakes. _Her true weakness, which she denies to this day. _

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><p>A new Steven! Will he get a title? Or will he be forever known as "New Steven?" WHO KNOWS? I DON'T.<p> 


	7. Wait, did everything shrink?

Hello once again readers! The Queen's lackeys just keep on growing in number. I think they should all invest in a little thing called birth control, but who has time to find that in the post apocalypse? ANYWAYS, time for more Queen stuff!

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><p>This new Steven was starting to get on the Queens nerves. He was constantly around, always poking and prodding the royal hinny! Knight Steven would occasionally make this new Steven stop, and give his royal highness a snack cake. Knight Steven seemed to have a soft spot for this new Steven; always paying more attention to him. Luckily Pounce De Fuzzums was around to be the Queens most loyal of subject. Pounce De Fuzzums and the Queen were out on a walk, with Steven 16 and Knight Steven. The new Steven was there too, being annoying. <em>The bastard. <em>

While out on the walk, the new Steven had an idea, apparently. The new Steven got the idea to get the tiny Stevens around the great and fearsome Queen. Knight Steven seemed to be worried, but the Queen took it upon herself to calm her loyal Knight. Surely these little Stevens pose no threat to her royal highness. As the mighty Queen was assuring Knight Steven not to worry, by placing one of her mighty pincers onto his foot and patting it, one of the tiny Stevens touched the royal tail! The Queen turned to the tiny Steven, and pulled back her mighty tail. The tiny Steven recoiled back, this was not acceptable! This tiny Steven should not be scared of the mighty Queen! The most awesome of awesome Queen put her pincer onto the tiny Steven foot, patting it. If only to calm the tiny, surely they could be calmed like Knight Steven, as he is the greatest example of Stevens everywhere. Whatever works on him will surely work on all other Stevens.

The new Steven took note of this, and came closer; the almighty Queen was still patting the tiny Steven on the foot. Ignoring with all her might the new Steven, _the bastard. _The tiny Steven then started to pat the mighty Queen atop her royal head, to which the new Steven got excited about. Clicking her approval the Queen stopped patting the tiny Steven and turned her attention back to Knight Steven. She assured him that she would never harm her royal subjects, unless it was new Ste-OH GOOD A SNACK CAKE, KNIGHT STEVEN YOU ARE SO AWESOME.

As the Queen was happily consuming her twelfth snack cake of the day, more tiny Stevens gathered around. Obviously taking in her mighty presence (also taking notes on how to eat a snack cake properly, Stevens are known for not being able to do this properly. You have to smudge the entire cake on you pincers and clean it off to consume it). Pounce De Fuzzums wanted some of the royal snack, the Queen was more than happy to share…after she consumed most of the snack, and Pounce De Fuzzums was getting fat after all. The Queen was only looking after her subjects figure, not being a pig; STOP SUGGESTING THAT.

As the walk was getting to its end, the new Steven corralled the mighty Queen and Knight Steven into taking a different route. The Queen was starting to get wary of the new Steven, maybe this was an assassination plot! The new Steven was from a rival kingdom, one that was on the march to take out her royal highness and Knight Steven! The new Steven would corner her and Knight Steven and use some kind of large knife to kill them both, the horror that the new Steven would bring upon them would be insurmountable and-OH, ARE WE BY THAT PLACE THAT MADE ME FEEL STRONG?

The Queen and Knight Steven were lead behind the Firehouse, to the place where Knight Steven and several of the other Stevens would not go anywhere near. The new Steven took off her royal highnesses accessory, and encouraged the mighty Queen to go near the place from before. The Queen obviously did not do so-NEW STEVEN, WHY DO YOU HAVE A SNACK CAKE? WHAT ARE YOU-NO DON'T THROW IT! The Queen ran after her favorite confectionary, moving as fast as her eight legs would take her. The mighty and really agile Queen caught the snack cake, and devoured it. The effects of the area started to take in the Queens mind, she felt STRONG, and more importantly, felt LARGER! The Queen would have been happy to stay there if not for the fact that the new Steven had another snack cake in hand. The Queen approached the new Steven, not noticing the shift in size. Knight Steven put back on the royal accessory onto the Queen, and led them back inside the firehouse.

Pounce De Fuzzums was happy to see Knight Steven, new Steven, and the mighty Queen. The mighty Queen noticed something, PUNCE DE FUZZUMS SHRUNK! The Queen, now in a panic took it upon herself to ensure that Pounce De Fuzzums had food in his food bowl. Surely Knight Steven wasn't starving the royal subject in charge of everything that was fuzzy. There was food there, wait. The Queen had noticed something, the entire building had shrunk. A small shrinkage, surely Knight Steven was still the mighty size that he had always been-NOOOOOO, KNIGHT STEVEN EVERYTHING SHRUNK. Worried about her surroundings and royal court in general the Queen refused the snack cake that Knight Steven had produced to calm her royal melt down. The Queen pushed the snack cake to Knight Steven. No one has been eating right in her royal headquarters, surely this was the cause-wait if the building had shrunk that means the evil stairs had as well.

Taking the opportunity, the Queen took point! Attacking the evil Stair menace one stair at a time (also knocking over the gate at the same time)! Taking mighty steps, she was easily climbing over one evil doer at a time, making sure to stab each stair at least five times. All of the Stevens within the building were watching this battle, giggling as the stairs fell one after the other (well not really, they all just sort of got holes put into them). When the mighty Queen made it past the last step, she saw a poster of the enemy of all Stevens, the Legate! The Queen took her mighty tail, and stabbed at the picture, making sure to stab off that smug face. Looking to her right Knight Steven was keeping a Steven (number 2) from getting angry. Pounce De Fuzzums was barking in triumph for his Queen. The Queen looked at the other posters that were put onto the wall-OH DEAR LORD DOES THAT STEVEN HAVE A FUZZUMS ON HIS HEAD? What evil creature would do such a thing to a Fuzzums? Recoiling in horror, the Queen looked at Pounce De Fuzzums, then to the picture. A Fuzzums should never see such a thing; the Queen took her mighty tail and took the picture off the wall. She took it off her mighty tail, crumpled it up and put it into the nearest trash receptacle. A clean kingdom is a good Kingdom. The Queen clacked disapproval to Steven 3, how dare he put such a thing in sight of Pounce De Fuzzums, doesn't he know that Pounce De Fuzzums has a gentle heart. Stupid Steven 3.

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><p>What is this? The Queen has grown in size? WHY YES SHE HAS. DEAL WITH IT.<p> 


	8. Molting

Hello once again readers! It's so nice of you to have stuck around this far. Really, I love all of you. NOW ONTO THE QUEEN!

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><p><em>Molting. <em>Molting is something that the Queen hated. She hated it more than doors, which is amazing. During the Queens great conquest of the stairs for the second time, she forgot about the shrinking of everyone else. That usually means that she, the great Queen…went up a size. Dashing her eyes around the room, as best as she can she sees all the Steven looking at her funny. _Such lousy subjects. _

The almighty Queen tries to move; however to no avail. She is truly and utterly stuck where she is. Knight Steven will surely come to her rescue! Yes, Knight Steven will-NEW STEVEN NOOOO, DON'T TOUCH ME, KNIGHT STEVEN HELP YOUR QUEEN! New Steven was lifting the mighty Queen up! And for some reason, new Steven had four arms, the other two the might Queen could not see. This new Steven had powers even the mighty Queen had no idea a Steven could get. _This one must be watched-_WAIT, WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME?

The Mighty Queen was being taken downstairs by new Steven. New Steven was uttering some noises, which were not directed at the Queen. Try as the mighty Queen might, she could not see behind her. Once put down on her mighty bed of snack cake wrappers the Queen got a look at the other set of arms—OH KNIGHT STEVEN, THERE YOU ARE. Knight Steven was rubbing his back for some unknown reason. Surely he had taken down another staircase. Such a good Knight. Knight Steven said something to new Steven and went up the evil and definitely defeated stairs. New Steven remained.

The glare that the Queen was giving new Steven would be recorded in all the history books. This stare could kill most, however new Steven was a mighty opponent. The Queen was starring daggers into new Steven, as he wrote things onto that paper. New Steven was taking advantage of the fact that the Queen could not move much at all, taking measurements of the mighty Queen, taking pieces of the molting-OH GOD YES, KEEP THAT UP.

New Steven was assisting the mighty Queen make this horrid process go faster. The smaller shell had to come off sooner or later, and it seemed new Steven knew how to do this without hurting the all-powerful Queen. Yes, new Steven will now be Molter Steven. Yes. Perfect. Now if only the mighty Queen could just properly place her pincer onto Molter Steven's shoulder to make it official—screw it. The Mighty Queen just chirped the title. No need for the fancy stuff today. Not worth it. The Queen let Molter Steven do his job, for the next couple of days the Queen waited for her shell to come to its full harness once again. This was something she had to deal with time to time, but with Molter Steven around it would go by faster. Such a good new subject.

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><p>OKAY, SORRY FOR THIS BEING SHORT. But yeah. I really had a hard time with this…molting is just gross. 8(<p> 


	9. ADVENTURE TIME

Hello once again readers! I know it has been a while; I seem to be taking longer breaks in between these. BUT BACK TO THE STORY.

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><p>Today the mighty Queen and Pounce De Fuzzums were left at the Royal Firehouse alone. The mighty Queen could not figure out why, however all of the Stevens marched out like it was for something important. Pounce De Fuzzums was scratching at the <em>evil foul door <em>for what seemed like hours. The Queen, being nice and awesome as she is she attempted to assist Pounce De Fuzzums in his attempts to open the door. The Queen took her mighty pincer and attacked the door-wait. The Queen looked at the door in puzzlement. There seemed to be a crack, leading to the outside. The Queen took her pincer, and _pulled. _Pounce De Fuzzums made a dash for the outside world as soon as the door was ajar enough for him. The Queen, with her…well she is far larger than Pounce. She had to open the door far more; she dashed out trying to catch him. As she dashed out after him, the other Stevens were watching in awe of how fast their leaders of this Kingdom are. Pounce De Fuzzums obviously had a head start, so he was ahead of the mighty Queen.

The long chase ended somewhere out of the Queens kingdom. Pounce De Fuzzums found water and was drinking from it, so the Queen joined him. Such a grand idea Pounce De Fuzzums had a nice scouting trip around the outskirts of her mighty kingdom. Pounce De Fuzzums will receive an award when they get back, THIS SHE SWEARS. Pounce De Fuzzums ears perked up, he had found something. Maybe it would be Knight Steven, along with Molter Steven? Either way, the Queen could feel the possible Stevens. They were a bit away from where she and Pounce De Fuzzums were, but with the Queens mighty leadership this should be a walk in the radioactive goo! Pounce De Fuzzums headed off in the direction that the mighty Queen was looking in. The Queen let Pounce De Fuzzums take the lead, no need for her to be the first thing that the Stevens met…if they didn't know her. That might be bad, as the little Stevens still react to her in a bad way. Other strange Stevens might not like her.

This was a mighty trek across the wastes was very uneventful. There were creatures along the shore, which were avoided. The Queen remembers the last time she encountered a creature of the wastes, she did not wish to relive that experience once again. Apparently neither did Pounce De Fuzzums. As they walked, the sun was going down. They had truly gone a long ways. As they reached the place where she felt the Stevens (This is an actual thing that Scorpions can do, they feel their prey before they see it), Pounce De Fuzzums decided to take a break. He curled up next to a rock and started to take a nice peaceful slumber. The Queen was not going to have this; he had to be on watch for her! Who knows what type of evil doers could be out here, just waiting for her to put her guard down! She sat next to Pounce De Fuzzums and nudged him. Pounce De Fuzzums just rolled over onto his back. Sighing, the Queen gave Pounce De Fuzzums tummy rubs. This was going to be a long night indeed.

When the Queen awoke, Pounce De Fuzzums was still there, licking her face as per usual the morning greeting. The Queen awoke, and yawned. Pounce De Fuzzums seemed to be in frenzy, running about in an excited manner. The mighty Queen with her ability to feel where Stevens are, could feel that a small group of them were close. Surely this must be Knight Steven and Molter Steven trying to locate her and Pounce De Fuzzums, such good subjects. The mightily awesome Queen and Pounce De Fuzzums went in search of these Stevens. Pounce De Fuzzums rounded a corner, and stopped. Pounce De Fuzzums began to growl. WHY POUNCE DE FUZZUMS? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE WRONG OVER HERE? I FEEL THE STEVENS-OH GOOD LORD THAT MAN HAS A FUZZUMS ON HIS HEAD. The Queen took action, and attacked that Steven! Her mighty stinger went for the Fuzzums Steven, he dodged. The Queen did not let up, this evil Steven must be shown as an example! No one takes Fuzzums heads and wears them as an accessory! That is just horrid looking and morbid. The Queen cannot let this fashion atrocity live. The evil Steven, along with his cohorts were taking out some strange looking sticks, and they were pointing them at the powerful Queen. The Queen merely looked at them funny before she went in for another attack; she went for the evil-OH GOD WHY IS THERE SO MUCH NOISE AND WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HITTING ME? OH GOD, AM I OOZING OUT OF MYSELF? THE PAIN.

The Queen recoiled from this weird onslaught. Pounce De Fuzzums attacked one of the evil Stevens cohorts; he managed to get one by the throat. Yes, excellent Pounce De Fuzzums. The Queen regained her composure; she attacked the evil Steven with her mighty pincer. She managed to grab him by the small appendage to his right. She took said appendage and gripped down as hard as she could. The evil Steven yelled out in pain and aimed his weird stick at the Queens face. Surely these evil people had heard about her triumph over the stairs, these are assassins! They are going to kill her and Knight Steven won't be able to do anything about it. She and Pounce De Fuzzums were fighting for their lives, and she was going to die first! Such a travesty, how could such a thing occur? She is the mightiest of mighty Queens. As the Evil Steven aimed something wondrous happened. His head exploded, the chunks of him sprung forth and coated the Queen. One of the evil Steven cohorts joined him, as his head exploded too. The mighty Queen began to worry, was this a disease that Stevens get? She must ensure that her kingdom gets vaccinated for such a thing. Steven head exploding disease seemed to spread like wild fire. The mighty and all-powerful Queen noticed that Pounce De Fuzzums ran off, she gave chase-but not before she stabbed the evil Steven in the torso for good measure. How dare he attack her and wear a Fuzzums head. Evil, evil Steven.

As the Queen chased Pounce De Fuzzums she noted that she felt more Stevens. This was going to be a long day, the fights that she will get in will be many and she just knew it-OH THANK GOD, KNIGHT STEVEN WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? THERE WAS A FUZZUM DESTROYER JUST OVER THERE AND HE HAS THIS WEIRD DEATH DESEASE WHERE HIS HEAD EXPLODES. WE MUST VACINATE YOU IMMIDATLY. Knight Steven was greeted by Pounce De Fuzzums first, with a lick and lots of bouncing. Soon the mighty Queen came up to Knight Steven, she saw her mighty and most beautiful of accessories being held in his hand. She placed her stinger in front of Knight Steven so he may attach the thing. Once attached, Knight Steven gave the Queen a good pat on the head. He said some goobly gook that could only be a compliment of her looks. Knight Steven is such a flirt. Knight Steven led the party home, and many a snack cake was eaten. It was delicious and epic. All at the same time.

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><p>Who in the world left the door open? And yes, Pounce De Fuzzums is incapable of seeing that the door was open, and that he could open it. Silly puppy.<p> 


	10. Fatty

Hello once again readers! It's been a while I know, and the Queen has reminded me every day…TURNS OUT I RAN OUT OF ANTIVENOM TODAY.

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><p>The mighty a fearsome Queen was looking at her bed, her used to be bed. She had grown far too large for it. Now the all-powerful Queen had to sleep on the floor. Pounce De Fuzzums continued to sleep next to the Queen every night, however when going out on the royal promenade had to be left behind. Knight Steven though linguistically powerful in his own strange tongue of Steven, had yet to be able to convey as to why such an arrangement had to be faltered. Molter Steven had taken it upon himself to get the royal promenade changed to go to a new route a while ago. The new route was of the Queens liking as the mighty and powerful Queen got to do battle with the rival kingdom! Oh so many battles had been waged, taking out what surely were hideous beasts; with their tiny beady eyes, stingers and pincers. Though for some reason the Queen could not help but think that they all seemed very familiar. Why, no one would be able to tell; as each encounter with them was met with a quick defeat by the mighty Queen and Knight Steven.<p>

Today had been no different, coming back from a glorious battle with those hideous beasts the Queen made sure that the tiny Stevens got to take notice of her shining carapace. Soaked in the blood of those things. The tiny Stevens had taken a liking to the Queen which she did encourage. Each tiny Steven was allowed a ride upon her back, the price only being _the enlistment into the door fighting army. _Though the Queen had defeated the might Stair Empire many a time, she had come to realize that they were mere stepping stones. Literally, that's what they are used for. For stepping, such wondrous things you can learn once you can climb things easily. Now her focus was on the only and true enemy of her lovely kingdom. _Doors. They had always been there, watching and waiting, taking notes on how to take her down from the sidelines. _The evil things are masterminds. The mighty Queen must take them down! Make them shiver in fear within their door jams! They will regret the day they decided to require a strange appendage that only Stevens had! How dare them! Don't they know she has other duties to deal with that Knight Steven does not know about! Like going out and attacking those Legate posters! Or taking out more Fuzzums killers! Those dastardly evil foul things, all of them must be eradicated! But alas, no. The mighty Queen must stay within her kingdoms headquarters, to be poked and proded by Molter Steven.

Molter Steven would often walk while in town with Knight Steven and the mighty Queen. The Queen had noticed that Molter Stevens belly had been protruding forward for quite some time, and had only been getting larger. Molter Steven needs to go on a diet, but the Queen is too nice to say such a thing to him. POOR MOLTER STEVEN, LOOK AT YOU WADDLE TO ME WITH-OH SWEET SNACK CAKES, A SNACK CAKE.

The mighty Queen gingerly grabbed the snack cake with her powerful pincer and began to munch down in a most powerful way. Knight Steven was rubbing Molter Stevens belly, Molter Steven seemed to enjoy the attention. Poor Molter Steven has no idea that Knight Steven is telling him he's fat. The Queen will take note of this and make Knight Steven apologize to poor Molter Steven, so rude he has been lately. Just a few lunar cycles ago, he was jumping poor Molter Steven in the beds upstairs (also on the stairs, on top of the work bench, in that closet in the corner, on the Queens old bed), ripping his poor clothing off. Then beating him senseless, with a lower appendage that the mighty Queen had no idea about, these Stevens hid all kinds of surprises. Surely this must be a Steven way of showing dominance or something, because surely this could not be anything else. Nothing at all. _Nothing. At. All. _After the every night beating poor Molter Steven began to grow fat. This must be some kind of defense, growing a fatty belly that the other Steven will feel the need to make fun of rather than to hit with his lower appendage. Yes, perfect sense.

Molter Steven gave the Queen a mighty soft pat, and cooed at her like he often did. Such a strange Steven, though Knight Steven seems attached to him; though those nightly beatings seem to suggest the other. Such a strange species, first the exploding heads disease and now the nightly beatings, _and now_ the tummy thing. These Stevens will forever perplex her royal highness. As they approached the firehouse, the mighty Queen took her place in front of _those damn dirty doors. _She waited until they came up to their proper position, far above her head where they should stay—NOOOO, KNIGHT STEVEN DON'T PUT THEM BACK DOWN, DON'T-OH HEY A SNACK CAKE.

The doors came down with little fuss from the mighty Queen as she devoured another snack cake. Knight Steven and Molter Steven went upstairs for the night, and the mighty Queen went to bed as well. Pounce De Fuzzums curled up next to the mighty Queen, and they took a most wondrous slumber. However, the mighty Queens mighty nap was interrupted by something during the middle of the night. The mighty Queen felt all tingly, much like when around those things around the other side of the firehouse. What could this be about? Turning, she noticed that Pounce De Fuzzums was not his very perky self. The Queen prodded her loyal and most fuzzy of subject, however Pounce De Fuzzums would not wake from his most mighty of naps. The next few days the mighty Queen waited for Pounce De Fuzzums to awake, however nothing of the sort happened. He remained still. The mighty Queen heard noises from outside, and felt movement however none of the Stevens she felt would enter her most royal of royal headquarters. A Steven was still moving upstairs, she could feel it. However the movements from upstairs halted altogether. The Queen could not understand why all movement went still, surely this tingle was nothing to Knight Steven and Molter Steven. It had to be. So the mighty Queen waited. She waited. Soon Pounce De Fuzzums started to look….well less fuzzy. The Queen moved Pounce De Fuzzums to her old bed, and waited. Waiting was so hard for a royal, she had things to do! No one was opening the doors for her! KNIGHT STEVEN! MOLTER STEVEN! POUNCE DE FUZZUMS NEEDS MEDICAL ATTENTION. WAKE UP…..KNIGHT STEVEN? MOLTER STEVEN? The mighty Queen tried to traverse her old foe, stairs, but to no avail. Her size was too great for them, also she could not fit through the tiny hole up top anymore.

The Queen realized that her royal entourage had been assassinated. By whom? She did not know, but she was sure it was either that Legate, the Fuzzums Killer, or _Doors. _Fucking Doors.

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><p>And thus the tale of the mighty Queen ends. It had been a good run, and I thank you for reading my tale of awesome, and heartbreak. SUCH A TEAR JERKER. cries


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